Tag Archives: Pixar

Sadness matters. How to embrace your tears.

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Sadness. The “blue creature” that’s inside your head and makes you notice gloomy things. Something that makes you emotional, nostalgic and down. Shoulder-length hair, round glasses, a sweater… here we go. That’s Sadness character in the Pixar’s movie “Inside Out”, speaking (and crying) with the voice of Phyllis Smith. I love how fairy tales can simplify and depict complex concepts in a way that is amusing, fun to watch and has a grain (or two) of truth.

Sometimes we think sadness is not welcome. It takes our power away and makes us feel miserable… It can take away our pleasures and cause us to be lonely… It can make us cry instead of enjoying our day. But should we really distrust sadness, hide it and treat it as a guest who comes uninvited and stays for too long? Do we really (as numerous self-help books suggest) need to strive for joy and think positively most of the time? I am not so sure.

Sadness can mess up many things, right? We are bombarded with pictures of happy people everywhere. Celebrities with perfect smiles (and lives, seemingly); success stories to hold onto (when we’ve just seen end results of someone’s achievements); pictures on Facebook that show only the best moments of someone’s life; self-help sections in book stores that lead you to believe that you must feel upbeat all the time to achieve fulfilment of personal and professional goals; job offers that accentuate traits such as being outgoing and bubbly… because you need to emanate happiness in order to attract customers to a brand, right? Well, that sounds a bit unreal to me.

We all experience all kinds of emotions. Sometimes at the same time. It may be easy to think that to keep up with all our obligations, commitments and activities, we need loads of positive energy all the time. However, life is not as sweet as a movie. Why struggle to be happy all the time?

Sadness has many benefits. Our tears are cleansing both our emotions and our eyes.

Forcing yourself to stay constantly “upbeat and positive” in your job can lead to frustration or even a breakdown, because it is an unattainable ideal. Everyone has bad days at some point, so why not feel them instead of trying to hide them? People actually connect with you when you are having a bad day. Sometimes even more than when you are emanating with happiness… Practiced. People like to show compassion to other human beings.

Feeling down always tells us something. Like pain. Physical pain is an indication that something is not going right in our organism. If you kill the pain, you kill the symptoms. The causes of it might still be there. Same with sadness. If we try to hide it under a fake smile, under “I’m alright” or under tons of work/entertainment, it will not automatically disappear. Well, it may, for a short time. But it may still be there when you check next time. There is a Zen practice of “looking deeply” that helps recognise the exact emotions we are feeling and what they point at. It is a really useful practice.

Sadness can sometimes bring fear, but running away from it doesn’t help. Fear is an elaborated fantasy of what may go wrong. Only embracing your sadness and trying to understand it can help shine light on what is really going on inside. This can bring marvellous results. Otherwise this unexplored emotional terrain might be scary.

Fantasy abandoned by reason produces impossible monsters: united with her, she is the mother of the arts and the origin of their marvels. (Goya)

 

Goya – The Sleep of Reason Produces Monsters (picture from Wikipedia)

Featured image photo credit: Sadness via photopin (license)

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DREAM !!!

When was the last time when you had this gut feeling, that urge, that was driving you to do something that you wanted to do for a long time? Have you listened to it? There is a silent (well, sometimes loud!) voice in our mind that speaks to us and if only we dare to listen, we could do AWESOME THINGS and use our talents and potential and achieve extraordinary ambitions. If only we dare to listen – I repeat! Well… that’s not always the case. I know, we have work, commitments, distractions, other halves, stuff to do, or we’re simply tired and not bothering… But without doing what we actually dream of, we risk losing something very important in ourselves, that’s a part of who we are, really – not who we appear to be to the world through our roles (employee, mother, etc.), but who we really are inside and what we want to achieve. Therefore, it is CRUCIAL, really crucial to follow our dreams. Our internal path. Wherever they lead us to. It will always be somewhere special. Because, as someone said:

Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you will find yourself among the stars.

And that’s the place to be, isn’t it? This path will always be interesting.

If you’re still not sure where to start, here are some options to get you on the right track:

Stay tuned, there will be more posts about your dreams here! One by one. :) To prepare you for your journey. Not everything at once ;) A daily dose of inspiration. If you want several daily doses of inspiration, join me on Twitter or Facebook – links on the right or below. Keep dreaming. That’s what everyone says. Let me show you one video.

This is from 10 years ago, back from when Jessie J was not famous, she was 15 years old. When asked what her goal was, she said: ‘a number one single’. Well, it must have sounded quite confident and unrealistic from a 15-year old girl at that time. But then… look at what she is now. She’s over-achieved her dream many times. Impossible? Don’t let anybody tell you what you dream of is impossible. How can they know?

If you still don’t know where to start, watch the animated movie “Up” from Pixar – such a sincere tale about life, that people of any ages could enjoy it. See the characters’ dream and… don’t wait too long. Life is too short for that. Just do what you’re meant to do. Start NOW. You don’t have to finish reading, or even watch the video. I mean it. Start NOW. Feel what you want to do. And make the first step in that direction. You will be happier.

Have fun while realising your dream!

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